Beta-replay Day.

It seems like my hope is flying out the window. I took another HPT this morning, just to torture myself, and it was basically negative. I used a Dollar Store test, which I've always had pretty good luck with, and there was a faint, faint line. It was even lighter than the test I took on Monday, which doesn't make me very hopeful. At this point, if I really was pregnant, the line would be much darker and would definitely not be getting lighter. Plus, if my beta has doubled like it was supposed to, the hCG in my urine would be at least 70 or above; these tests are supposed to pick up anything above 25 which would mean that my levels have either gone down or stayed the same. Basically, they probably haven't doubled. Which will mean I'm probably going to miscarry. I still haven't gotten my period nor have I started spotting, so I'm just biding my time until the RE's office calls to give me the bad news. I already rescheduled my consult with the RE for January 31, so I'm sure we'll talk about what the next step is at that meeting.

I slept terrible last night too, which is always bad. I had a terrible sinus headache from all the pressure in my left ear and the pain was so bad that it woke me up at 1:00am and I couldn't get back to sleep for a few hours. Then I kept dreaming about HPTs. It just wasn't a good night.

I'm feeling pretty numb right now. There's not much I can do about anything so I'm just trying to keep busy and keep my mind off it. I just feel like we were so close this time. God, I hope that I didn't cause this by stopping my meds. I guess the good part is that I got to be pregnant again, even if it was only for two days.